Adil Malia
Feb 1, 20191 min
Being judgmental, most of us succumb to the urge of giving feedback. Incorrectly given, feedback has potential to create animosity.
A thread from Ramayana for lessons..
Sita was a 'dharmacharini'.. an obedient wife. She supported Rama un-hasitatingly whilst he was fulfilling his dharma. But inherent in that was a subtle duty - pose a road block if he ever strayed away from his dharma !
Rama had promised the sages to destroy the powerful demons in the forest. Sita was worried for that meant Rama getting exposed to dangers of a ferocious war. Sita objects by raising a question of 'dharma' to road-block Rama. Rama she said was overstepping his role. It was King Bharat's role now to protect the weak. Thus it was adharma.
Rama patiently listens. Gives Sita +ve feedback. Thereafter Sita not only got convinced but became a protagonist of Rama in his war against the demons.
This Rama-Sita conversation teaches the 3 questions to be asked for effective feedbacking
1. Check if you have the authority to feedback.
2. If you do, check if you have the right 'motive' to feedback
3. If you do, check if feedback is being given at the right place,the right time & under right circumstances
Positive feedback converts opponents into allies