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  • Writer's pictureAdil Malia

Arrogance The Destroyer

Arrogance destroys is no new learning. Yet why the arrogant don't learn ... continues to be a mystery.

Duryodhana the villain of Mahabharata had the opportunity to give only five villages that Krishna sought for the Pandavas as their emissary and retain his father's empire. Duryodhana was even cautioned earlier by a sage in as many words : "Fourteen years hence, you shall be destroyed in battle by the Pandavas, along with your kinsmen and all that you hold dear".

Yet the arrogance within was nursed and allowed to poison the reasoning within. He refused in arrogance to give those five villages and lost his Empire. And Duryodhana was no less a wise king who one could say did not understand this basic linkage. (In Mahabharata, Duryodhana actually attains Haven after his death. But that philosophy is a different higher story for another day.)

Arrogance once allowed to nurture & fester within, slowly grows and takes over rationality and causes emotional and spiritual blindness. Unfortunately, the bearer can't see his arrogance and everybody else can't miss it. What a tragedy.

We often see arrogance in all kinds of leaders in life. Political, Social. Corporate leaders not excluded. It is necessary for the Hero to gracefully call out the 'arrogance' of such leaders when the first time they experience it. Maybe not in an equally arrogant way but to call it out and handle it is necessary.

Here are 6 tips for you to handle & cope with an arrogant person :

1. Communicate the problem subtly with him. Be compassionate, but don’t try to fix the arrogant person. His arrogance is the problem. Not him.

2. Arrogant people are internally defecient and thus indeed feel the external need to exhibit superiority which takes the form of arrogance. See the situation as that. Help him cope with those deficiencies.

3. Communicate directly and tell him or her how the behaviour comes across. Be gracefully bold. Ask ... "what got you angry today?"

4. Involve a mediator or organise a greater number of people to communicate this message. Sometimes direct communication backfires, which is why you might want to include a third party to help diffuse the situation.

5. Reduce the harm by setting limits. Never remain silent and endure abuse, whether in a personal or professional relationship. Set the limit and gracefully thereafter call out.

6. Be mindful. Whatever you decide to do, do things deliberately, thoughtfully, and with as much love as possible without recalling the past each time. Arrogance cannot be handled as retribution.

By the way, the 5 most arrogant Corporate Leaders identified (for curiosity) in a random survey are :

1. Steve Jobbs - Apple

2. Jack Welch - GE

3. Rupert Murdock -

Media 'Fox'

4. Mark Pincus - Zynga

5. Larry Ellison - Oracle

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